21-Counselor Issues

On December 8th 2018, I found out the real reason my counselor didn’t want me posting on Facebook. I was working an event for Lefty’s, my hotdog stand, at the fairgrounds when one of my friends and I started talking about my abuse. He was also abused, so I was asking him if it was normal and to not care if my abuser died and we went into conversation about it.

He said, “That’s very normal. After 11 years I still want revenge, but you get use to it where it won’t bother you as much anymore.” I’ve talked to many abuse victims and this is what they all seem to say. I had been abused in the past, but I never realized it and I never wanted him to die, so I just thought I was straight up nuts. Come to find out its very normal. For someone who has never been abused you probably won’t feel that way or you’ll think that’s just completely crazy, I use to feel the same way. It’s actually very logical thinking for a survivor because narcissists don’t view people as people. They view people as objects that they thrive off intentionally hurting. For a survivor they believe their life would be better off without their abuser in it. It is a pretty normal feeling I’d say.

My friend and I were talking about the abuse and how it was ok for me to feel all of these emotions and to do whatever I needed to do to heal properly. If that meant to post on Facebook, than do it. I told him that my counselor told me I couldn’t post on Facebook anymore. He was at my counseling place and told me he overheard my counselor talking to my abusers counselor. He told me he overheard Dick’s counselor go to my counselor and say, “Tell Karlee she needs to stop posting about the abuse on Facebook.” I was irate. I said, “What did my counselor say back to his counselor?” He said, “Your counselor said he would take care of it.” Again, my counselor told me on 3 separate occasions that I could not post on Facebook. I was so pissed off! I said to my friend, “Well his counselor doesn’t know about all the abuse he’s done to me.” My friend replied, “Um well yea she does because Dick counselor’s had a meeting with your counselor and the head director to discuss everything that has happened.” I’m not going to tell you how my friend knows all of this information because I choose to protect his identity, but this is what he overheard.

In my opinion it's complete bullshit. I never signed any paperwork for my counselor to discuss my issues with anyone else. Plus, I was going there to get help from the abuse Dick had put me through. I thought it was bullshit that they knew of all the abuse, but they were still protecting him, plus manipulating my counseling sessions. Dick should have nothing to do with my life! Aren’t counselors supposed to be advocates against abuse not for abuse? Dick is so manipulative that he was able to manipulate his counselor into believing he was a saint. His counselor then manipulated my counselor into also believing it, who then manipulated me. Something I had lived through for 2.5 years and was trying to overcome!

Needless to say I no longer go to counseling there and I will continue to share my story loud and proud. I had a meeting with my counselor and the director that my mom and aunt joined me at. My counselor admitted to everything. They had to give me all of my money back and I can wish to take it further like suing or getting their licenses taken away if I wish. I don’t wish to ruin their careers, but I don’t think they are in the right profession if they want to share people’s mental health issues. It was against the law and very inappropriate. It was also a very detrimental to my healing process. It made me very angry and actually made me take steps backwards. After my friend told me those things that night at the event I got in the car to go home and cried all night. I was so angry!

I’m happy it is now being resolved. I do however believe that my abusers counselor owes me an apology and also needs to figure out if she is for or against abuse. Instead she pretends like she doesn’t notice me around the town because she knows what she did was wrong! If she is for abuse then I suggest she finds a new job. Maybe she would enjoy dog fighting if she likes abusive behavior? I don’t know though because I’m not her and I don’t condone abuse! I’m just happy that I know longer go to a place that manipulated my decisions and now I can heal properly again.

Happy and Healing!