Timeline 13-Lefty's Trailer Hell

The day before we were leaving to pick up trailer, I contacted the company to let them know were going to be heading down to pick it up. It was going to take ten hours to get there, so we were going to stop and sleep on the way. I had everything set with my girls at work. They were all scheduled to take my hours, so I could pick it up. My mom was going to take care of everything else. The company emailed me back saying that I needed to wait to pick it up because it wasn’t ready yet. I was furious! The trailer was supposed to be done in 6-8 weeks, it was now week 11. I told them I was coming either way and if it wasn’t ready by the time I got there they could give me my money back. It was definitely unneeded stress.

I was venting to Dick and telling him what was going on. He sent me a naked picture of himself with a text that said, “I hope this puts you in a better mood.” Um thanks, but no thanks! With having trust issues, I look at everything in detail. In the corner of the picture there was a bottle that you use a needle in. I sent him a text back saying, “What is that bottle in the corner?” He tried playing dumb saying, “what bottle?” I responded, “The one in the corner that you use a needle in.” He called me. When he’s lying he doesn’t like to text. He knows that when he could get me on the phone he could easily manipulate me or scream and not let me get a word in. When I answered the phone I was calmer than normal. He tried explaining to me that the bottle was just medication that he was using for his headaches and that you didn’t use a needle that you used a plunger. He told me that he would take it under his tongue and his headaches would go away. Yea, ok, BULLSHIT! Anyways, our counselor had told him that if he wanted to gain my trust back that he needed to overcompensate, so I said, “The counselor said that you need to overcompensate if you want me to trust you again, so send me a picture of the bottle.” He said, “Ok” and hung up the phone. A few minutes later I got the picture of the bottle and him holding the needle in it so I couldn’t see the end. The bottle said, “MASS BUILDER PHARM.”

Great, exactly what I thought it was, steroids! He knew I was not ok with steroids. He already has a very fast heart rate, high anxiety, and breathing issues while he slept from past drug use. I was fucking pissed because he had promised me he wasn’t taking steroids anymore and hadn’t been since he got “clean.” Although, a year prior I had found a needle wrapper on his bathroom floor and told his brother who said, “You got to be fuckin kidding me. That’s a steroid needle wrapper.” When I confronted him he screamed at me. He got all defensive and said that was from his old drugs days. He supposedly used to hide drugs and drug paraphernalia all over the house. Being naïve I believed him and let it go. This time that I found out he was using steroids again; he instantly told me that he already told his brother and the rest of the family, so I don’t have to say anything. I was so pissed that he was lying to me again that I didn’t even bother telling anyone. I didn’t give a shit anymore.

The next day I was supposed to be driving ten hours with him to Tennessee, so I called my counselor. I told him what had happened and asked how to handle it. My counselor told me not to bring it up and we would talk about it when we got back, so I did what he said. We left one night after I was done at work at about 8pm. I wouldn’t talk to him because I was pissed and my counselor said not to mention the steroids. We had just passed Delavan on our way towards Rockford and he started screaming at me that I needed to talk to him. I said I didn’t have anything to say and he kept going off. I finally said the counselor told me not to talk about it, so I’m not going to. It was the longest two days of my life. I had nothing to say to him, yet he kept making rude comments like “yea I get to sit in a truck for two days doing you a favor and you won’t even speak to me.” No apology, nothing! Just him being an asshole!

When we got back from Tennessee he dropped me off and went to his house. He had come to my work after everything happened and told me he wanted to stay together. I told him I didn’t want to and that I was pissed he was still lying to me. He continued to deny it was steroids, yet I had already messaged people in the fitness industry to make sure it was. I tried to shut the Lefty’s door on the old trailer and he kept putting his hands in the way and yelling at me. He did it about three times. On the last time I said, “Do it again.” He said, “What are you going to do?” I said, “Punch you in the nuts as hard as I can.” He responded, “Go ahead ill call the cops.” I said, “Go ahead, I told you to leave.” He got pissed, slammed the door, and screamed “Go die.” He opened the door and said, “I’m just kidding.” I ignored him and he stormed off. After this he tried calling me a bunch of times to tell me it was a joke he used to say with his friends. He told me he was sorry and wanted to be together.

He ended up coming to my work another day and apologizing and admitting they were steroids. He said he didn’t want me to be mad at him, so he just lied about them. For some stupid reason I ended up taking him back. He promised me he stopped taking steroids because he didn’t want to hear me bitch about it anymore, so I thought he was changing and I forgave him.

I thought my new Lefty's trailer was more appropriate than the steroid bottle.